Why is my dog scared of me?
This is a question that’s frequently gets sent to my inbox. And to be honest, there really isn’t a clear-cut answer to why some dogs display this troubling behavior.
Although dogs will demonstrate fear in different ways, this doesn’t change the fact that it can be particularly worrying when that behavior is directed towards you.
Why do they do it? …Take a guess.
I mean, some dogs just naturally anxious, and it doesn’t matter what you do or say in their presence. The fear of humans is just something that’s deeply ingrained into the psyche.
And while it can be heartbreaking to witness, it’s not something they can just get over in a day or two.
Now, there were many reasons for this…
It could be that you’ve unknowingly done or said something that’s instilled the fear of God into them.
…It could be that they’ve been adopted from a rescue shelter, and they’re unfamiliar with their new surroundings.
Or it could even be that the previous owner has mistreated them. And as a result, they’re extremely wary about anyone they come into contact with.
But whatever the reason, it’s something that, if not addressed quickly, can put a huge strain on the relationship with your dog, often leading to more troublesome behavior further down the line.
So what can you do?
Well, dealing with any doggy behavioral issue, big or small, is always going to come with its own set of challenges. And it’s ultimately how we overcome these challenges that will to determine how our dogs adjust to us in the long run.
But if there’s one thing that’s certain, it’s that teaching your dog how to remain calm and in control of their emotions is the first step to setting them off on the right path.
So before you do anything else, I’d highly recommend taking a few minutes to check out the short video below from Dan Abdelnoor (aka Doggy Dan) over at The Online Dog Trainer.
In a nutshell, this unique one-of-a-kind training program is going to teach you everything from A to Z about how to train a well-behaved obedient dog. But more importantly, a dog that doesn’t run for the hills every time you set foot near them.
And I guarantee that if you watch and apply the powerful techniques Dan demonstrates in the video below, you’ll be well on your way to having a confident dog that doesn’t shy away from your presence.
Here’s the link to take a look: Click Here To Discover A Powerful Technique That Will Quickly & Easily Stop Your Dogs Fearful, Anxious Behavior!
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Why Is My Dog Scared Of Me?
If you’ve recently noticed some worrying developments in your dog’s behavior that might suggest they’re wary around you. Or even visibly worried when you enter the room or approach them, then it’s time to act!
It’s a situation that no dog owner wants to be in, and it can leave you feeling hopeless, depressed, and even thinking about finding your beloved pet a new home. But the key to winning back your dog’s trust and reducing the fear is first to understand why your dog is scared of you.
Depending upon your dog’s previous experiences, a whole host of things can spook them. Despite your best intentions, you may have accidentally reminded them of a traumatic experience in the past or caused them to worry about an action you might take.
Your dog could be scared of you for one [or more] of the following reasons:
You’ve unknowingly scared them
Although you will hate to admit it, you might have accidentally scared your dog by doing something to them, as innocuous as it may have seemed at the time. Perhaps you shouted at them for peeing on the carpet or approached them in an aggressive manner when you returned home from work in a bad mood.
Remember, dogs can’t communicate the reasons why they’re scared, so you might have done something to freak them out without knowing.
If you can, think back to what may have happened in the past few days and consider anything that might have caused your dog to show fear or anxiety.
They’ve been mistreated by previous owners (or dogs)
If you’ve recently rehomed your dog and rescued your pup from a shelter, you have no way of knowing what their life was like before coming home with you. Maybe they were mistreated by their previous owners or physically abused for going into certain places within the home.
Naturally, they will be scared of the same thing happening again, as dogs will associate their surroundings with their previous experiences. If they’ve fought with dogs in the past, they might be wary of your other pups, even if you know they’re good-natured.
They might be picking up on your body language
Dogs instinctively pick up on the body language of their owners. So, if you’ve been scared, worried, or anxious in recent times at home, it may be the case that your dog is reflecting your behavior and seems scared of you as a result.
If you can relate to this, try and adapt your behavior at home so your dog can realize that you’re not always like this. It will help them to change the way they’re behaving, too.
As we’ve seen, there are several reasons why your dog might be scared, and it’s almost certainly not your fault, so don’t beat yourself up! But how do you know for sure if your dog is actually scared or whether they’re just a little bit anxious or uncomfortable about something?
Related Post: Why Is My Dog Scared Of Other Dogs?
Signs your dog is genuinely afraid
The best way to ascertain if your dog is genuinely afraid is to look at their body language. They may have retreated into their shell somewhat or may even be hiding under furniture or trying to distance themselves from you.
It’s normally quite easy to tell if a dog is scared or anxious, but the following signs will help you know if they are genuinely scared…
Their ears are flat
If your dog’s ears are flat against their head, it could be a sign that they’re scared or even becoming aggressive. Don’t mistake this for when your dog’s ears are forward, which is a sign of curiosity.
Their tale is between their legs
When your dog’s tail is between their legs, it’s one of the most notable signs that something is wrong. While this doesn’t always signify fear (as it can just as easily be sadness), when displayed alongside some of these other behavioral cues, it’s likely to be a sign of fear.
Lack of eye contact
When humans are scared, we avoid eye contact with other people, and the same is true of dogs.
Their eyes might be glancing around the room or may even be fixed on a particular spot. But if they’re scared, they will avoid looking you in the eye for a long period of time.
Yawning excessively
While dogs yawn when they’re tired or bored, a more prolonged and intense yawn is a sign that they’re stressed or scared.
If these prolonged yawns happen regularly in a short space of time, it’s a sure sign that your dog is scared or anxious.
Licking their lips
When dogs lick their lips, it’s a sign of an appeasement gesture. They do this when they’re feeling uncomfortable, and it’s evidence that something is happening around them that they see as a threat.
If your dog is exhibiting one or more of the above behavioral cues, it could be a sign that they’re scared.
When coupled with their generally depressed or hunched body language, this should be enough to prove to you that your dog is scared, and you need to try and do something to comfort and reassure them.
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How to stop your dog from being scared
It’s all very well understanding the reasons why your dog is scared, as well as being able to recognize early warning signs that they perceive you as a threat.
But how do you actually do something about it?
Well, this depends upon the reason why your dog is scared, which is why you need to start by thinking back to your recent exchanges with your dog.
When you’re confident you think you might understand why your dog is scared of you, try some of the following steps to help understand your dog’s mindset and build trust in your relationship…
Identify triggers
An important first step in managing your dog’s fear is identifying any triggers that actually scare them. Remember that every dog is different, and you don’t necessarily know what happened to them in their formative years.
Some things to consider when identifying triggers include:
- Loud noises inside (washing machine, TV, etc.)
- Loud noises outside (trains, fireworks, etc.)
- Being in a specific part of the house.
- Socializing with other dogs in a particular place.
You will need to pay attention to your dog’s responses to particular triggers and make notes about the ways in which they behave. This will help you identify what is causing them to be scared.
Consider the way you interact with your dog
If your dog is scared, the last thing you should do is scold or punish them for being so. Aggression will simply breed more fear, so you mustn’t lose your temper and do or say something you will come to regret.
Equally, you shouldn’t smother them with too much love, as this can also make them feel uncomfortable and could even spark aggression as a defense mechanism. The best way to interact with a scared dog is to treat them with respect and speak to them in a way that will build rapport and trust between you.
Reassuring them by acting in a way that is confident and respectful will help them to come out of their shell and understand that you’re not going to hurt them.
Socialize your dog
Socialization is a hugely important part of every dog’s development. However, many dogs that have been abandoned at shelters or mistreated earlier in their lives haven’t been appropriately socialized.
This means that they’re easily spooked by external stimuli and are scared by normal, everyday occurrences that they automatically perceive to be threatening. The good news is that you can socialize your dog at any age, although older dogs require a little more patience. Here are some things you can do:
- Take your dog on walks to new locations, so they can experience new scents and interact with other dogs and people.
- Use positive reinforcement or treat training to desensitize them to situations that they fear.
- Consider exercising your dog alongside friends and their dogs. This will encourage them to be sociable with people and dogs they’re familiar with.
When you’re socializing with your dog, it’s so important that you don’t lose your temper or shout at them when they do something you’re not expecting. This will only exacerbate their fear and will make them even warier of you.
Closing Thoughts
Nobody wants their dog to be scared of them. It’s undeniably a stressful thing to experience as a dog owner. Even if it’s not your fault, it can be disheartening and is likely to make you feel guilty.
If you think your dog is scared of you, begin by studying their body language. When you’ve picked up on the cues that suggest your dog is in fear, you can then look back at what’s been happening recently and try and understand why your dog is behaving in such a way.
It’s then time to employ some of the tips we’ve outlined above to try and help your dog overcome their fear. With some patience, positive reinforcement, and support, you will begin to see improvements in the way your dog interacts with you.
